Making Space — What We Lose, What We Find

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Hello again, my friends. Welcome to episode three of Still Here, Still Trying, the coolest podcast out there. Listen, today’s episode is titled Making Space, What We Lose, What We Find. And I’m so excited to have this conversation with you. talking nonsense sometimes. I really appreciate it. I know that it’s bringing value to many of your lives, so that’s great. But before we dive in today, I have an ask of you. I always hate to ask for help, ask anyone, but I need your help.

So if you’ve been listening and these episodes, all of two of them so far, and number three, if this podcast has brought you something to think about, if it’s helped you feel a little less alone, if it’s reminded you to keep going or just given you something to sit with, will you please help me out? Please take a second to like, follow, subscribe, comment, do all the things that help this kind of work find the people who need it. And if you can, please share it with at least three people in your life.

But not just any three people, three people who could use a reminder that they’re not alone. people who are still here, still trying, just like you and me. All right, well, let’s get into it. I referenced this Instagram post at the start. And like I said, it’s been living in my head lately. And I love it when you see something and it just takes up space in your head. You find yourself reflecting on it again and again. It was really simple. It was just a post with text on it and a cool little background.

But it said, everything I lose creates space for everything I need. Let me say that again. Everything I lose creates space for everything I need. Now on the surface, it’s simple. But the longer I’ve sat with it, the more I realize how much weight it carries. How often we overlook the role that loss plays in shaping the parts of our lives that truly matter. We move through life holding onto so much. We have jobs, we have friendships, we’ve got these roles and expectations that we have to live up to.

We have these dreams that we’ve been carrying since we were young. We have identities that we thought were permanent. And then one by one, some of those things start to leap, sometimes by choice, sometimes by force, sometimes it’s slowly, and sometimes it happens overnight. But what’s left behind I think it feels hollow at first, right? That’s the part that nobody talks about. It’s the space, the silence, the ache, that gray area, that sense of uneasiness that just sits right here.

It sits in my chest. I feel off. And it’s easy to mistake that space for failure. I know I do that all too often. But to believe that if something left... whether it was a relationship, a role, or a version of ourselves, we must have done something wrong. But here’s what I want you to remember. Space is not punishment. Space is an invitation. Now, I’ve lived this. I’ve held on too long to roles that weren’t aligned anymore, to relationships I’d outgrown, to dreams that belonged to a version of me I no longer recognized.

But letting go felt impossible. because I had convinced myself that my worth was tied to how much I could carry. But every time something left my life, whether I chose it or not, space was created. And over time, that space stopped feeling empty. Friendships with more depth began to show up. Work that allowed me to lead with more heart took shape. Music that felt more honest started to pour out of me. Not because I forced it, but because there was finally room for it to breathe.

Now, these weren’t overnight changes. They were slow. They arrived quietly. I don’t think I even realized that they were coming. But they filled the space that I’d been so afraid to make. So when something ends, we’re left standing with open hands. And I love that emoji, right? It’s open hands. That’s a hard place to be because it feels exposed. We are like, what’s going to happen? It feels uncertain. But open hands are necessary if we’re going to receive what’s next, right?

You have to have your hands out to receive. The temptation is to fill that space as quickly as possible, to grab for something new so we don’t have to sit with the discomfort. But the longer we can hold the space open, the more room there is for something better to arrive. Because hope grows there. Creativity grows there. Healing takes root there. We aren’t wired to enjoy the empty season. Oftentimes it’s pain, right? We aren’t wired to enjoy pain.

But those empty parts of our life, those empty times where we’re trying to figure it out, they teach us what matters. They clear the clutter. They force us to ask harder questions. And I’m going to give you some good ones that I want you to remember. I want you to write these down. Just come back, play the episode again. So question number one. What am I holding on to that no longer serves who I’m becoming? Let me say that again. What am I holding on to that no longer serves who I’m becoming?

Next one. What am I making space for by letting go of what no longer fits? I love that one. And then the next one. What deserves my time, my heart, and my effort moving forward? Those are powerful questions. And I think if you can let those sit in your head the next couple of days, if you think about them as you meditate, as you just move through life, you’re going to come up with some really cool answers and they’re going to take you by surprise.

You really, you won’t be, you’ll be shocked at what comes. So remember those questions, put those into your head. In my book, The Optimist Way, on my shelf, here’s the one book on my shelf, I wrote a lot about these in-between places, the spaces where we haven’t quite arrived, but aren’t where we used to be. And again, it’s that uncomfortable place. These are the moments where hope feels like a choice, not a certainty. Those moments, they truly matter.

They shape us. They ask us to trust ourselves. Something beyond what we can see right now. And I know that’s uncomfortable. Hope often lives in these quieter seasons. It doesn’t make noise or demand attention. It waits for us to make space, to stay open, to keep moving forward, even when the road ahead feels uncertain. And that’s what this podcast is rooted in. It’s a reminder to keep going. A reminder that we’re all doing the best we can to create something meaningful out of the space we’ve been given.

So I hope that this has been helpful for you. I hope you go back, you listen to this episode again, and think about the questions that I’ve brought up. Think about the conversation that we’ve just had. Because I know that there’s something powerful waiting for you as you create that space for the world to open up and bring you something new. So thanks for spending this time with me. I am so grateful that you’re here. I’m grateful that you’re listening.

I hope that you’re reflecting and staying open. So if there’s one thing I hope you take away from this conversation is this. The space you’re holding right now is shaping what’s coming next. You don’t have to rush to fill it. You don’t have to know exactly where it’s leading. Trust. that something good is already finding its way to you. Everything I’m building, the music, the writing, the podcast comes from that same place, a place of connection, a place of hope.

And I’m so glad that we are still here and still trying. I’ll see you next time. Have a beautiful day.